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January 03, 2009
Oh silly Russia...
... this is why you fail.
A KGB trained, Kremlin backed, analyst has anticipated the fall of America and which counties each of the states would fall to. LOL When I think of Idaho (my former state) falling to China, it just makes me laugh. Go on then, try and find a chinese restaurant anywhere outside of Boise and you'll have a quest on your hands in that crazy redneck and often racist state. Same theory applies to Alabama which of course goes to Mexico. HAHAHAHA.
Is Russia so unable to grasp the concept that America doesn't play well with others, a long term depression would be simply that. These states really don't dissolve because essentially we'd have to belong to someone else... and for us to actually want that would require there to be a country better than the US (well US without Bush as president which we will be in 2010). I'd rather be broke and penniless in America than free in Mexico or ... I guess they call it free in China. Screw that. Well, OK, I would kinda like to be with France, but only if I could actually live in France not in Tennessee repping the European Union LOL.
Further the expectation is set in 2010. Good lord, the economy won't even really have time to fully crumble before 2010. I have pre-orders from Amazon to be delivered in 2010! And he kind of forgets that we are the central economy. What leads anyone to believe that a depression here won't instigate it just about anywhere else. We are a global ecosystem tied into American and Chinese consumption.
If anything I believe it's more pertinent to prepare for the rise of the machines. My toaster has been waiting for the chance to cooperate with the microwave and unleash a robotic Armageddon. I'm pretty sure the toaster is thinking for itself now because I adjust the level to 5 and it barely warms the toast. And I'm pretty sure it's evolving. Specifically I think it's learned to use tools as it held the toast down after it was supposed to pop up last week resulting in FIRE. That's right it's discovered fire. There's what you need to be afraid of! I'm pretty sure thought that Idaho would fall with appliances not motor vehicles. Perhaps alabama would be safe from this whole event (possibly the home of the rebellion) as I don't believe technology currently exists there.
California and Washington would definitely come under the control of the computers though. No question. We'd all be doomed to having out brains replaced with lame ARM processors from IBM forced to watch a nonstop photo-slideshow of LOLCATS... UNBEARABLE!
Posted by Decemberice at January 3, 2009 09:29 AM
Comments
...you might be on to something here.
See, yesterday while cooking eggs, the oven range burst into flames. I had to put it out with a spatula.
WHAT DO WE DO? D:
Posted by: Zoso at January 3, 2009 11:53 AM
I wouldn't mind being part of mexico, if I actually get to move to somewhere like Cozumel and live out my expat days on a beach. But, yeah, I agree. I don't want to be mexican in Alabama...or Idaho, or anywhere else.
That being said, this is all really moot. Every great civilization says the world ends on 12/21/12. My 30th birthday. So, at best, if he's right - we'll have to live 2 years figuring out who is a citizen of where and then we're all finis.
maybe they should write an article about THAT and encourage people to rack up their credit cards and spend their savings before the end comes. It may be just the thing to turn the economy around.
Posted by: Sarah at January 3, 2009 12:38 PM
@ Zoso- We run. That's all mankind can do when a toaster bares it's teeth.
@ Sarah- I was pretty sure your birth would somehow be tied into the end of the world I was just a bit fuzzy on the how.
Posted by: J at January 4, 2009 10:53 PM